mousehands : ask philip

showing question #100

question from sweet christ

I am almost ready to make the next big step in my quest for frisbee world domination. I have entered a period of intense training consisting of eating pies whilst wearing a restrictive body suit so all the piefat settles in my arms, making them extremly heavy, thus enabling me to throw a disc ridiculous distances. The only drawback is that the pastry is growing through my nose, making breathing, and more importantly grunting very difficult. How should I alleviate this problem?

As ruler and despot of Frisbee World you must challenge me directly. Where did you get these crazy pastry notions from? Bob Holness, I bet. I should have executed him when I had the chance. What I fool I was to tell him my entire plan while he was strapped into my (flawed, as it turned out) DeathMachine2000, and not just shoot him in the head with a regular hand gun, available from schools everywhere.

But you are weakened! See how you produce strange filling-bubbles when you breathe. Your defeat will be a lesson to all that I can never be deposed.

Dominik Diamond would be ashamed.

This question was asked on 28 June 2002 and answered at an unknown time.